STREAMING NOVEMBER 2020
in collaboration with Valhalla Media Live
FEATURING
Emily Cox
Jennifer Barrett
Mary Lutz Govertsen
Jimmy Morehead
New Vocal Music
by Elizabeth Rudolph
with poetry by
the composer,
Julie Ann Ball,
& Yvonne Strumecki
PROGRAM
Time Stops (0:12) (Julie Ann Ball)
Mary & Jimmy
Litany (Explicit Lyrics) (Yvonne Strumecki)
Litany for the Sexually Lost (4:55)
Things You Never Say (8:31)
Street Sex (15:03)
Emily & Jimmy
The Singer Laments Their Breath (17:30) (Yvonne Strumecki)
Mary & Jimmy
Just a Phase (23:45) (Elizabeth Rudolph)
arr. Jimmy Morehead
Jennifer and Jimmy
TEXTS
Time Stops
I remember how we used to measure time
the hand that passed the 12 o'clock hour
midnight and noon
and halfway in between
each we rose to meet the day
and we fell to meet the night
we did our working thing
and our grocery shopping
banking, oil changes for the car,
and the daily crossword puzzle
buried in the daily news
that was a mirror for yesterday's headlines
we did all that
until a cool breeze
on a hot August day
stopped time
to measure moments
in breaths of memories,
in songs in Spring.
and night and day
and summer and winter
became the same
and death and birth
and birth and death
mixed up all together
so we could never measure time
and we saw it never ends
a cool breeze on a hot August day
in the middle of March.
12 March 1997 - Julie Ann Ball
Things You Never Say
You must be really tired
because you’ve been running
through my mind all day
UR so hott
Your body is bangin’
Those tits are huge
What size cup are you?
Can I get your number
or Can I call you sometime?
I'd really like to see you again
I'd really like to see you
I'd really like to...
fuck you
because age ain’t nothin’ but a number
Baby, You know you want it--
even when in reality, yes
he really is a thirty-one-year-old virgin
Is a normal man so hard to find?
So why can’t you find him?
Stop trying
Stop trying to find men
Stop trying to find men online
Why can’t you
just look around you?
You’re so wonderful
You’re so beautiful
You’re so damn intelligent
Flattery will get you nowhere
Flattery will get you everywhere
Flattery will get you
when you are in that much pain
Will you massage my back?
Is the laundry done?
Is my dinner ready?
I’m leaving
I’m waiting
I am going to
wait.
Stop.
Don’t stop
Maybe only this once
This will be the last time
I promise
I care
I love you
I swear
I can not
Yvonne Strumecki
Litany for the Sexually Lost
Sex is a silent humming, a master machine in the back of men’s minds, always running ready for the revelation that she just might actually want
Sex, the pulsing warmth within a woman’s waiting body that can never quite be touched enough times in the places only she knows for sure
Sex, is everything leading to the hovering seconds before two lips can delight in the release from the ache of waiting for
Sex is nothing but two bodies being smothered, limbs together entangled but one never quite knowing what the other will do next for
Sex, the pushing, pulsing, grinding to a halt, is it over, are you finished, was that it, just once more, give me five minutes and I’ll try again for
Sex, being something that I once remembered doing
needing
wanting
having
done
Yvonne Strumecki
Street Sex
I used to like that silent come-
fuck-me gaze men give, walking
down heated summer streets
unaware. He starts
at my legs in the dark-
washed jeans, perfectly boot cut, rising
up over my thighs and stomach to rest
at my breasts, my lips and linger
there, for a moment I see
dark eyes meeting mine. A tear of
flesh he wants to fuck - his indecent thought
caught in this single stare. A stranger
no more for that brief moment. I know
his thoughts are spent. My breath
leaves parted lips, dry with wanting. The need
for more than just a look conveyed,
and again I am left alone
walking down pavement
untouched.
Yvonne Strumecki
The Singer Laments Their Breath
I stand behind the curtain
alone, waiting for the rise,
holding onto the only thing
I hold dear. Wanting to exhale,
but unable to let go. Afraid of
a sound so close,
as if my breath were
the only thing escaping.
My lungs unwilling to expand
enough. Air leaving my lips
too quickly. The phrase is lost.
I, the desperate fool who dreamed
of the stage; a singer needing
more than the silent crowd
waiting bated for the next
act to begin. Bravo being
so far ahead that I cannot
fathom holding onto this forever.
Yvonne Strumecki
Just a Phase
canvas and wood, fresh air and teen sweat
finding my way in the dark
knowing they stacked the odds against us
but her lips were soft
plastic paneling, backdrop for appraisal
in a space intended for my search
you were meant to be my guide and mentor
but full of judgement
A sky full of stars, a lake full of memories, here I am me.
strong as an oak, supple as a reed, I see me.
limestone and beer, crisp winter and twin beds
learning all about myself and you
I learn to stand tall and be sincere
but still feel like a souvenir
A sky full of stars, a lake full of memories, here I am me.
strong as an oak, supple as a reed, I see me.
They said it was just a phase, but I'm older and older and still the same.
You said it was just a phase, but twenty three years later I’m still the same. Still the same.
too hot half the year, too grey in the winter
finally appreciated with you
city full of friends, space for our diversity
accidentally found my home
A sky full of stars, a lake full of memories, here I am me.
strong as an oak, supple as a reed, I see me.
Elizabeth Rudolph
PROGRAM NOTES
Time Stops:
This poem was written by my aunt in the week after my grandmother died. It deals specifically with the feeling of hollowness when someone you care about leaves this life. Suddenly the mundane things you used to do with that person take on this preciousness and meaning that one may or may not have noticed before. In this time of pandemic, with so many people dying, I wanted to write a song dedicated to those of us who have lost loved ones. It's especially difficult in this time because we're so isolated, which means a lot of people are dying (not necessarily of COVID) without the opportunity to say goodbye. I did try to keep the musical language of this piece as accessible as possible in order to allow it to speak to a wider range of people.
Litany Set: (Language Warning?)
This set of pieces deals with some taboo topics: female sexuality, female pleasure, societal norms and what happens when we break them, gender roles, relationship problems, etc. Litany For the Sexually Lost has a repetitive piano part that reflects the heart and breath of the lovers as they entangle while the vocal line rides over that with commentary. Things You Never Say is a very complicated poem and a very complicated piece. The 5/4 meter and the syncopation is intended to create a sonic world of discomfort and breathlessness. The lyrics are harsh and difficult to hear and to sing. The vocal line is awkward and disconcerting. Street Sex seems like a simple poem of a public interaction of strangers, but there's more to it than that. It is a woman owning her body. It is an interaction of equals, consenting adults. The running bass line is the pulse of the city around them, continuous and unrelenting...
The Singer Laments Their Breath:
This piece for voice and drone is presented here with only one voice, but is also possible with a group of voices all singing in their own time. This poem took on fresh, raw meaning when the COVID-19 virus arrived. The performance industry has been hit extremely hard by this pandemic and the...random assortment of responses by governments around the world to control it. All of us musicians are waiting in the wings for the moment when we can finally take that stage again. Until that day, the chord won't change. We're stuck in our living rooms and empty halls, making art with little collaboration and no feedback from our audience. It's a piece of mourning and also of hope that our industry will survive this.
Just a Phase:
This song was commissioned for the 50th anniversary of Stonewall by Jimmy Morehead and the Chicago Gay Men's Chorus. It is autobiographical and I hope it conveys some of the things I've felt and experienced when it comes to my sexuality over the decades since I came out. It is in standard pop/rock song form, with verses and a chorus and a bridge.